Welcome, to the Bad End Route - V3 SS 11

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Volume 3, Side Story 11: Bad Selection, Broken Heart ~Missing~

 

→ Keep silent and wait at home

　 Don't wait

 

 

Tomorrow was the last day of school and the day of Hanae's make-up exam.

These seemingly short but lengthy days made me realize the magnitude of Hanae's existence.

I never imagined that Hanae, who had been with me for so long, would leave me.

I made the mistake of taking for granted the fact that she was always beside me.

It wasn't my intention to belittle, but I wasn't so sure if I had ever thought about it.

I was thinking that what Hanae told me was also true, that it was selfish delusions that this was how childhood friends should be.

Why did I have such a ridiculous fantasy that no matter what happened, Hanae was never going to leave me?

I never expressed my thoughts on the matter, nor acted on it. I accepted the situation as it was and just treated it as natural.

And yet, when the situation was about to change, I still got anxious. I really felt like an idiot.

But then I realized. It wasn't yet too late.

 

"―― Hanae, wanna go home with me?"

"Susumu-kun? That's unusual."

 

After school that day, as soon as classes ended, I approached Hanae and called out to her.

This might have been the first time I ever asked her to go home with me. Usually, after school, Hanae was the one who would ask instead.

 

"But sorry, I have make-up exams tomorrow."

"Are you going to stay here and study? I could wait...or rather, I could teach you."

"It's fine. I still have the problem sets."

 

As she said this, Hanae began to prepare to leave. It looked like she was going home, but she couldn't even go together with me?

Now that I thought about it, I didn't remember many instances where Hanae refused me. Despite what I said, Hanae always followed me around.

Perhaps because of that, a slight sense of urgency was born inside my heart. It was as if things would never go back to the way they were if I wasn't able to talk with Hanae today.

 

"Hey, Hanae. Can you spare me some time? I need to talk to you."

"...I understand. Then, I'll go to Susumu-kun's house later."

 

She told me she would come to my house to talk, but she had no intentions of going with me.

Maybe she had something to do. But for some reason, her saying that she would come later instead bothered me.

 

―― Keep silent and wait at home

 

I should just shut up and wait at home. Hanae said she would come, and I didn't want to do anything unnecessary that would prevent her from doing that.

I waved goodbye to Hanae and headed home alone.

――――

――

―

 

Since Hanae didn't seem like she was arriving any time soon, I was about to call to check up on her when the intercom rang.

I looked to see who would do that at this hour, and there, was Hanae.

Did she ever ring the intercom before? Anyway, I invited Hanae inside.

 

"Sorry for intruding."

"It's fine. I wanted to talk to you, too."

 

Silence fell as we faced each other across the table in the living room.

Normally, Hanae would have offered to make drinks, but she showed no sign of moving.

 

"Hm? What's wrong?"

"Ah, um...d-do you want to drink something?"

"I'm good."

"I see..."

 

I felt something weird. Hanae didn't seem nervous, just the same as usual.

Under such discomfort, I began to talk.

 

"S-so, Hanae. So, your make-up exam is tomorrow..."

"Yeah. That's why I have to go home early and study, too."

"Why don't do just do that here? If you wanted to, you can even stay the night..."

"No, I'll go home."

 

I was quite prepared to say something, but I was so easily rejected.

Her tone sounded natural, as if this decision didn't even require any thought.

 

"...You'll come back again after the exam...won't you?"

"..."

 

This was where Hanae's expression changed. It was the serious face she had that I'd seen several times recently.

Did she have to make such a face? I was just saying that things should go back to normal again.

 

"...Hey, Susumu-kun. I know I've asked you this before, but why do I have to come back?"

"T-that's...up until now..."

"Up until now?"

"Haven't you been doing that up until now?! Didn't Hanae come here because that's what you wanted to do?!"

 

I couldn't help but put a lot of power in my voice. I didn't think it was that loud, but Hanae might have been startled.

However, Hanae's expression didn't change, and she made a shocking statement while carrying a slight smile on her face.

 

"Sorry. I didn't come here because I wanted to."

"...W-what do you mean?"

"If you don't know, then it's fine."

 

I didn't know, I had no idea what Hanae was talking about.

She said she didn't come here out of her own will, then whose request was it?

No, there was my mother. She might have asked Hanae to take care of me who was living alone.

Speaking of which, when Hanae started coming to our house, she said something like that.

 

"But even so, did you have to come that often? Hanae must have also felt a bit..."

"Such a thing..."

"T-that's because it's your obligation, isn't it?! Considering how much we've known since we were kids..."

"That's right, huh. I wonder it came to this because we were childhood friends in the first place..."

 

I didn't know. I didn't question it. I didn't ask anyone.

Was it too late to regret now? Would everything had been different I had known, or if I had tried to understand?

Whatever the case might be, my thoughts remained the same. I only had one thing to say.

 

"I want you to be by side from now on."

"..."

"I'm grateful for everything you've done for me, and without Hanae...I wouldn't be anything."

"...I wish you said that a bit sooner..."

"That...sorry."

"It was hard for me, too. But no one said anything. Everyone just silently accepted it was the natural thing for me to do."

"T-that's not..."

"But, I did it because I had to. That was fine in the past. It made me think I was needed."

"..."

"..."

 

Not knowing what to say, I could only stare at Hanae in silence.

I didn't know what was going on, so I couldn't express anything but my feelings.

I understand that doing that was a mistake. Therefore, I could only wait for Hanae's words.

 

"H-Hanae...?"

"Sorry, I ―― have already made up my mind."

 

She raised her head, which had down for some time now, and Hanae spoke clearly.

Despite the sadness in her expression, she showed no hesitation, and I could feel the strength of her determination.

 

"I won't come here anymore."

"...You won’t?"

"Ah, it's not like we're going to stop being friends, or even childhood friends, you know?"

"..."

 

Our relationship wouldn't change just because she would stop coming over. Hanae continued on with that, but was that not something big enough?

She was gone starting at this point from now on. That was a big change, if anything.

When I kept silent, unable to say anything, Hanae stood up.

 

"H-Hanae? Wait ――"

"―― I'm rooting for you and Reika-chan. If something happens, I'll help you, so please tell me."

"I-I've already given up on Reika! That's why..."

"Is that so...but I'm sorry."

"A-about what?"

"I ―― also have someone I like. So, I can't stay here. I don't want to be misunderstood."

"Huh...?"

 

What was up with that? Wasn't that the biggest reason?

It was one thing to say that earlier, but now you were saying you couldn't keep staying here because you found some guy you like?!

Then why didn't you just say that in the first place! The matter about me liking Reika didn't even actually matter!

 

"At first, I was patient because I knew still had to come here."

"Patient...?"

"I didn't intend on falling in love. It was only going to make it harder for me."

"Then what you said a while ago..."

"But you know, that person...well, he might be an exception."

"..."

 

What was with that face? I didn't know what she remembered, but her smile...I had never seen that.

Even though I'd in Hanae's life for longer, I guess I wasn't now.

No, was I even included in the first place?

How...did it come this.

Who, who was it. That guy who changed Hanae, the one who let Hanae leave me.

 

"Then Susumu-kun, have a fun summer vacation."

"..."

 

How could I possibly.

I couldn't say anything back to Hanae as she ultimately left, and all I could was look at the table until the sun went down.

 

――――

――

―

 

"―― Hello."

"..."

"Hello? Susumu?"

"Ah..."

"What's wrong all of a sudden? You miss your mom?"

"Don't joke with me..."

"Okay, okay. Are you asking me when I'm coming back? Might be during summer vacation ――"

"―― It's about Hanae."

"...Hanae-chan? What happened with Hanae-chan?"

"...Hanae, why did she come to our house?"

"...Did you hear anything?"

"I...don't even know anything."

"..."

"...Hanae-chan's family ―― isn't in a very good situation."

"Situation...?"

"Well, there's a lot of things going on. I didn't want to leave Hanae-chan in that house right now."

"...Don't tell me, the reason Hanae came over often..."

"I told Hanae-chan to come over."

"I haven't heard anything about that..."

"Because it's not that easy to say."

"...What happened?"

"...Hanae-chan's father had his business fail."

"Fail...?"

"Maybe that's why the couple's relationship...isn't very good, and I felt sorry for Hanae-chan..."

"..."

"So, I talked it over with Hareyama-san and the others. I told them that I would take care of Hanae-chan while they concentrate on their business."

"...And then?"

"Hareyama-san and the others didn't react too good. Hanae-chan who saw that too was troubled."

"But she did come, didn't she?"

"...A few years ago, I decided to lend money to the Hareyama family."

"...Money? My mom to Hanae's parents?"

"At the time, we discussed the possibility of keeping her with us as a condition for the loan."

"...Those conditions, did Hanae know?"

"I don't think she did...unless her parents told her."

"..."

"I didn't want to let Hanae-chan be when the situation was like that, so I had to be a bit forceful..."

"Was the situation really that bad...?"

"At the time. Maybe I should have gone to a children's consultation center or something, but...I was friends with them and both of you were also childhood friends."

"Childhood friends..."

"I've told Hanae she can stay with us until her family's situation improves. ‘You could even marry Susumu if you wanted to’, I said to her."

"..."

"That's why Susumu, please be a place that Hanae can return to."

"A place...for Hanae..."

"That Hanae-chan, has nowhere else to go."

"..."

 

I, couldn't even become a place for Hanae ――

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